Postpartum-Dads

I am hearing more and more moms saying they are going to pump breast milk so that dads can be involved in the care of the baby. I have such a difficult time understanding this logic. Let's look at some ways dads can be helpful in the postpartum period and be very involved in the newborn babies life.

Mom and baby have co-existed for nine months, this relationship is not going to change overnight. Moms and babies need to continue to co-exist after birth only now the position of the baby has change. If you look at the physical needs and psychological needs of the newborn, it would appear that if it were not for size, the baby would stay inside for a longer period of time. This same rate of develop that baby had inside mom, continues outside...baby continues to get nourishment, comfort and care from the mom once outside. What does that mean, the time of separation is not at the time of birth, but is a gradual process over the next few months. The reason the baby is expelled from the body is because if it stayed inside, it would no longer fit through the pelvis. Some look at this period after birth as the fourth trimester. Moms and babies should not be separated at this point for both of their sakes.

Dads continue to do for your wife what you did during pregnancy for the fourth trimester

• help with household chores (keeping the house clean or at least not messing it up any more is huge.
• making sure moms have food to eat (this doesn't mean you have to cook, you may pick up a meal, coordinate friends and family to bring in meals, heat up a frozen dinner)
• be her legs ( she is likely tired and sore, get her things so she doesn't have to get up)
• take care of other children (again you don't have to do all this yourself, coordinate with friends and family)
• encourage her verbally ( she is likely to feel inadequate, hormones are doing crazy things, don't try to fix it, just let her cry if needed, tell her things will get better and hold her)
• be patient ( you will get your wife back :)

Some wonderful women wrote on labors of love face book...check it out. You can just hear the love in their hearts as the tell of all the many wonderful, little things their husbands did for them.